Making friends

I think one of the hardest things for me to ever do is let go of my friends from the past and begin to replace them with once who would help me grow spiritually. Heck I always thought I could keep everyone in my life, but throughout the years I've realized I can't. I may love some of my friends from the past, but a lot of the times they drag me in to my old habits and then I find myself wondering why I fall. 

However, making new friends that are good for me is hard. I feel as if they won't understand where I've been or what I've personally been through or why I struggle with the things I do. I feel as if the will judge me and never look past my past to see who I am today. 

Fast forward to now. I've made a handful of friends that have helped me through some pretty tough times however when I am with them and they begin to talk about people they have known growing up and they things they have done I picture myself as those people. I do this because heck I was that person at one point in my life. I did the things they talk about and well it sets me back. I start to wonder if they knew my complete past would they still treat me the same? Would they understood where I came from or would I just be another girl they talked about. Which scares me because some of them do know my past personally and it makes me wonder what they say about me when I'm not there. Do they talk the way they do about the other people from their past or do they respect what I've been through. 

I guess what I'm getting at is why do we judge so quickly when you don't know why the person made the decisions they did in their past. We don't understand what they are personally going through or what exactly was said or done during that time. Have you ever found yourself doing that?!? Cause heck I am guilty of it as well especially once I got active again in the church. However after falling down numerous times I've realized I've had to humble myself and gain an understanding of people before I opened my mouth. It's crazy how sometimes you don't realize your doing something until you are around people you care about and see how your being destrutive.